A letter to you;

Dear Readers,
What is trust?
Honeslty though?
Do people even know the meaning of it anymore, cause they sure as hell don't act like it.
Because. Some one is always out to get them.
Or someone has said something about them.
Or so on so forth.
But everyone is just the same.
Everyone has issues with trust, whether it be they trust too much or too little.
If you trust too much, your leaving your self open to countless oppurtunities for people to let you down.
The more you care, the more your likely to get hurt.
But if you trust to little. How can you ever have a healthy, normal relationship or friendship.
Without feeling a little paranoid, betrayed, left out.
How can you ever know if some one is true or not. You have to trust them.
But what if they're not true but you trust them anyway. Hello broken heart.

I heard recently that 'the most power lies with he person who cares the less'.
Really comforting right? Because you can't deny the fact that it's true.
Because they person who cares most is likely to bend over backwards for the person that they care about, so then the person who cares less can make the other do whatever they please. Being a dickknob = Power.

And whats with not caring at all?
Oh it's harder than it looks, and it hurts more than you could ever imagine.
But why are some people made like robots? They just don't care.
Because they have had so many people hurt them, ones they didnt think ever would.
So their instant reaction is to clam up, and not care about much.

And judging? For fricks sake. Get the hell over yourselves please people.
The time has past where we sit there and say omg look whats shes doing or I cant believe he just said that. We're not in grade eight anymore.
Just kick back, relax. Either be friends with someone or dont.
Dont take the pussy way of being friends but chucking a bitch about them when they arnt around.
At least say it to their face? Honestly.

2010 will start a new era. Well It's started already.
The CHILL. era. Just smile. Relax. Don't let politics get to you.
Stay uninvolved. Don't bitch. Thats the lifestyle I'm taking up from this instant.

It can't change the lack of trust for people, it won't change my sudden outbursts of.. well.. weird. But I'm hoping it can change my dodgy moodswings once I dont let people shit me off. I'm hoping it will just make things easy.
I need to buckle down in school, I don't need this immature bullshit that people bring into everyones life. Honestly.

Back on the judging issues. I talked to a few people last night.
That, me as a bitchy shithead, had always disregarded as pathetic, or dropkicks.
But they arn't. And I shouldnt have judged them. And I'm pretty sure one of you read this, so I'm sorry. They are actually pretty hilarious. And I had missed this whole great personality because I had only listen to what people said about them, or based on what I had seen them do.

I'm sorry. To everyone.
For what I have been, as of late.
I have been so distracted its not even funny.
But three weeks away will do me good I believe.
So I can think about everything, practise my chill behaviour.
And hopefully I'll be good as new for everyone when I get back.
I hope you all enjoy your holidays, and I'll post again sometime next week.
Love, Rachel.